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Ella’s parents were divorced when Ella was in fifth grade. Because Ella blamed God for not answering her prayer to keep the family together, she gave up living like a believer. She began to sneak out at night, skip church, and skip school. At first, the discipline at home and school was moderate: detention, being grounded, a tighter curfew. When Ella rebelled and continued to do whatever she wanted, the discipline was more harsh. She was expelled from school and no one trusted her. Finally she was badly injured in a car accident in which the driver was drunk.

Sometimes we don’t like to think of God as someone who disciplines us when we rebel and go our own way. “That’s not loving!” some people declare. Actually, the opposite is true. God disciplines us because he loves us, just as an earthly father corrects his kids to help them live a better life. If God didn’t love us, he’d let us rebel and do nothing about it. But he knows that the consequences of living a life without him will kill us. The Lord will do what’s necessary to convince you to get back on a path toward life. That’s because he loves you so much.

Joseph’s father loved him more than his brothers. His father also gave Joseph a beautifully colored robe. Joseph’s brothers were so jealous that they ripped off his robe and threw him into a deep empty well. Later, they sold Joseph as a slave!

Bella also felt other people’s jealousy. She had taken voice lessons for years, and she had the best voice in the seventh grade choir. She was careful not to brag or show off. Although no one was surprised when she won the lead in the spring musical, several girls were angry about it. During one of the rehearsals, a coil of rope was left where Bella would be sure to trip over it. She did—and sprained her ankle so badly that she had to quit the show.

What happened to Bella—and to Joseph—was totally unfair. They may have both asked, “God, why did you let this happen to me?” “Why?” is a question that God often doesn’t answer, at least not right away. He asks us to trust him instead, even when bad things happen. Later we may see the good that came out of the bad situation when we trusted God with it. That happened to Joseph. Being sold into slavery in Egypt put Joseph in a position to later save many lives during a widespread famine—including the lives of his brothers and his beloved father. While you wait for God’s outcome, He always gives you the power to overcome fear and discouragement.

We don’t live in heaven yet. Our world isn’t perfect, and neither are people. Sometimes bad things happen. But through it all, always remember: God loves you, and you can trust him. If you’re patient, he will bring amazingly good things out of any situation.

We have all been given good things. Jasmine loved her new cocker spaniel. Hannah loved making apple pies with her grandmother. Michelle loved her new baby sister. Kayla loved having a day off without homework. Kelsey was grateful for her new jeans. Melissa loved her best friend’s laugh. Amber loved her dad’s sense of humor. Stephanie was grateful for passing her science test. Alexis loved sitting by the lake on vacation. Each girl was grateful for a different good gift, but each gift came from the same source: God above.

People often think they make their own good things happen. Far from it. “A person can receive only what is given from heaven.” (John 3:27 TNIV) Every day we have so many things to be thankful for, so many good gifts in our lives. Do we deserve any of it? No. In fact, even though we were born sinful, God chose to offer his very best gift to each of us. “The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 6:23 TNIV) When you accept that gift—when Jesus becomes your Savior—it blesses both the giver (God) and the receiver (you)! Every day God showers us with wonderful gifts. What should be our response? “Praise the LORD! Oh, give thanks to the LORD, for He is good!” (Psalm 106:1 NKJV)

You’re not usually a quitter, but you feel like quitting now. You’ve been sick with a viral infection for a month. The infection is about gone, but you’re overwhelmed by a month’s worth of schoolwork to catch up on. There are two projects to do, whole chapters to read, book reports to write, and tests to take. You can’t even decide where to start. You know you’ll flunk for sure!

Your friend Morgan knocks on the door. “I’m here to help,” she says. Sitting down at the table, she makes a “to do” list of each assignment you have to complete. “I know you can do this,” Morgan said, “and I’ll come over every day after school to help. If we tackle three or four things on the list every day, you’ll be caught up in no time.” You smile. With your friend’s encouragement, you feel like you can succeed!

Some people prefer to tear others down, while others build people up. Some have a special gift for encouraging others, but it’s a quality all believers should develop. “Let us aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up.” (Romans 14:19 NLT) In practical terms, what does it mean to be an encourager? Speak only those things that are helpful. Study a person’s situation. What does that person need? Build them up in that area—and you’ll be blessed at the same time.

Taylor didn’t like her life anymore. She didn’t like having a baby brother and complained about his noise at night. She detested their new neighborhood, which was full of old people. She argued with her mom about babysitting and with her dad about going to the mall alone. Taylor resented the household rules her parents made and questioned everything they asked her to do. One thing really puzzled Taylor though. Her new friend, Amanda, had stricter parents and more brothers than Taylor, yet she was always happy and made others smile too. Nothing seemed to bother her. How did she do it?

Amanda had learned to look for the good things in her life: loving parents, a happy home, good books, and good friends. It’s all about attitude (a girl’s beliefs and feelings about life.) You can choose a rebellious attitude, complaining and arguing about everything. This is what the Bible has to say about rebellious people: “These people are grumblers and faultfinders; they follow their own evil desires; they boast about themselves and flatter others for their own advantage.” (Jude 16 TNIV) Or you can choose to praise God for his wonderful care, and be thankful for your many blessings. “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.” (Colossians 3:15 TNIV) Choose a thankful attitude—and experience joy and peace.

It’s your first weekend in the new apartment, and you find it utterly depressing. You know lots of kids go through a divorce, but you had no idea it would be this hard. You haven’t even felt like getting dressed yet, and it’s mid-afternoon. Your hair is stringy, and all your eye make-up is underneath your eyes. You’ve seen more attractive raccoons. Dear God, help me, you pray. Get me out of this pit of depression! You wait for an answer to your prayer, but what you hear surprises you. Wash your hair. Put up posters and pictures of your friends. You groan at the idea of moving off your bed. You just don’t have the energy. On the other hand, staying this way isn’t helping.

You pray for strength and drag yourself to the bathroom. An hour later, after a shower, your hair is squeaky clean, your jeans and shirt are clean, and you’re tackling that dungeon of a bedroom. By suppertime, the multi-colored bedspread and curtains have brightened up the room, posters adorn the walls, and snapshots of your friends encircle your mirror.

We don’t always have control over what happens to us or what situations we find ourselves in. But we can always choose our responses. We can choose to make every place we occupy more beautiful: home, school, after-school job, wherever! You can also make yourself more beautiful no matter what you have to work with. One simple (free and easy) way to instant beauty is to stand up straight and SMILE. Nothing beautifies like a smile.

Temptations to do something wrong come disguised very well. If you’ve ever tried to catch a fish, you know that the hook must be hidden inside something deliciously tempting to the fish. That worm—the bait—is perfectly suited to the fish. The devil treats you just like you treat that fish. He knows your needs and weaknesses. He chooses the perfect bait to tempt you. Be on your guard! Under every tempting bit of bait is a sharp hook designed to kill.

Friends can tempt us, without even meaning to. Maybe we’ve spent all our allowance, but a friend says, "Come shopping with me. Just put the clothes on your mom’s credit card." Or maybe we’ve decided that all that caffeine and sugar in our sodas makes us too jittery to sleep, so we give decide to give it up. Then we go for a pizza, and our best girlfriend decides to share her super-sized cola with us. It’s mouth-watering tempting! Both situations—shopping and sipping—look like fun. That’s the bait. And what’s underneath the wiggly worm? An invitation to overspend, go deep in debt, and get grounded. Or an invitation to be a nervous wreck, unable to sleep or study.

Some temptations served up by so-called "friends"—pressure to drink or take drugs—are easier to spot. Be strong and boldly say, "No, thanks." But also be on guard for those sneaky temptations, where the shiny bait disguises a hidden hook. Be alert—and don’t take that bait!

You sometimes secretly feel guilty when watching the news and you see the horrible things happening in the world to other people: famine, earthquakes, wars, accidents, attacks, plane crashes… You quickly pray, Help those people! while guiltily glad it didn’t happen to anyone you know. And then came the storm and the boating accident. Four people from your church picnic drowned—including your dad. Even though it’s been a month, it still doesn’t seem real. Your mind won’t accept that he’s truly gone, that he won’t sail through the front door again, home from a business trip with candy in his briefcase for you.

But he is gone, and sometimes when it hits you, you can barely breathe. You know he’s in heaven and you’ll see him again some day. But each morning the loss hits you—and your mom—all over again. You read your Bible often through blurry tears these days. One verse—how Jesus came to heal the broken-hearted—has become something you and your mom cling to. You believe God’s Word is true, even though you don’t feel healed yet. You believe someday the pain will ease, then eventually go away—even though you’ll always miss your dad. In the meantime, the two of you take it on faith. "Thank you, Lord, for starting the healing process, even though we still hurt so much," your mom prays with you. "Jesus, give us strength to go on. Amen."

Today you may not be dealing with a painful loss, but you may know someone who is. Give them your hope. Show them that Jesus came to save them for eternity—but also to heal their wounds now. "He has sent Me to heal the broken-hearted." (Luke 4:18 NKJV)

We’re told to love others as we love ourselves, but you may find that loving your neighbor isn’t as easy as it sounds. You’ve always liked your neighbors, but then one summer the Carlsons move in next door. From the noise blaring from their house, you figure they have at least a dozen kids and six dogs. It turns out to be only five small children and two dogs, but you think it’s still too many. Your bedroom windows overlook the Carlson house, and you hate having your windows open now. You no longer hear the breeze blowing through the pines or meadowlarks chirping. Instead, noise and commotion—kids yelling and dogs barking—blast from the house next door till long after you go to bed. Loving these new neighbors will take a lot of work, you decide.

First, you need a change of heart. “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:31-32 NKJV) Over the next week, you work out a strategy. Twice you offer to baby-sit the kids, you accompany the older ones to the neighborhood pool, and you take them all to your church’s Vacation Bible School for a week. Through these acts of service, you actually grow to enjoy your new neighbors. Do you suppose that was God’s plan all along?

Brianna knew about anger. She loaned her new bike to her best friend who promised to take extra good care of it. It was returned bent and crumpled. Her best friend had left the bike in her driveway, where her dad backed his truck over it. The frame was bent, and the red paint was scratched. Even though her friend offered to get it fixed, Brianna was furious. She wanted to call her friend names and scream at her. Instead she bit her tongue. For an hour, Brianna ranted and raved to herself about her irresponsible friend. When she calmed down, she knew she had a decision to make. Would she punish her friend by venting her anger or giving her the silent treatment? Or would she forgive her and drop it? Brianna called her friend, made arrangements to get the bike fixed, talked about school for a few minutes, then hung up. She still hated that her bike was damaged, but she was glad she’d kept her friend.

Christians don’t lose their emotions when they get saved, but you don’t have to continue giving in to a bad temper. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” (Ephesians 4:31 TNIV) Don’t just stop there. After dealing with your anger, take things one step further. “Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” (Colossians 3:12 TNIV) Ask God to change you from the inside out. He will!

You hate going to school and beg your mom to homeschool you. You’re smart enough, but there’s so much fighting near your school. Hotheaded members of rival gangs rage against each other, making the neighborhood dangerous for everyone. Your biggest fear is getting caught between a couple of warring students on the way home from school. The gang members yell threats at each other and make convincing predictions of what they’ll do to each other. You just want to get far away from them and their rage.

Some people believe that respecting God’s instructions and avoiding sin will be boring. But it’s not boring—it’s safe. “The path of the upright leads away from evil; whoever follows that path is safe.” (Proverbs 16:17 NLT) Hotheads stir up trouble. A wise person tries to make peace. Do everything in your power to avoid hotheaded, rebellious people. Your life will be better for it!

Gabby had always had a hot temper. She hated being told what to do—by her parents, her teachers, her older brother, her youth pastor. She didn’t really mean to, but arguing words flew out of her mouth before she thought about it. She was tired of the consequences of shooting off her mouth: detention after school, having her allowance taken away, getting socked by her brother. Then she read a verse in the Bible: “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” (James 1:19 TNIV) Gabby correctly figured that if God wanted her to be slow to speak, God would give her the power.

How can we know what God’s will is? We can find God’s will in his Word. It’s spelled out for us in his commands and needs to be stored in our minds and hearts. There is one more important step in seeing your prayers answered. You must have faith (or believe) that God answers prayer. “Without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” (Hebrews 11:6 TNIV) Find out what God wants you to do—then be confident that He will help you to do it!

You’ve been a believer since you were eight years old. Since you were home schooled, most of your friends are from church or other home school families. When you start middle school in fifth grade, you’re shocked and hurt by the kids who make fun of you. They ridicule your longer skirts, your “What Would Jesus Do?” bracelet, and the kittens on your notebook cover. They call you a baby—and worse. You grow to fear going to school.

When you finally confide in your dad, he helps you find the courage God has given you. “I know that you stand firm in the one Spirit … without being frightened in any way by those who oppose you.” Philippians 1:27 (TNIV) He helps you learn how to “stand firm.” From then on, you face their comments with a calm assurance, knowing God will save you from the effects of their attacks. Your calm, unwavering attitude also has an effect you didn’t expect. Your attackers grow uncomfortable, back down, and eventually quit. They even begin to treat you with respect.

Hailey had been obedient as a small child, but when she was eleven, it suddenly became harder. She felt her mom was too picky about cleaning her room and limiting TV and phone time. Even though Hailey kept most of her irritation to herself, her stomach often hurt. When she finally decided to obey willingly instead of reluctantly or with irritation, the upset stomach disappeared.

Being obedient is good training for life. . If you’re obedient to your parents when you’re a child, it’s easier as an adult believer to be obedient to God’s Word and live a happy, abundant life. Obedience has to be learned. Even Jesus had to learn to obey—did you know that? “Although He was a Son, He learned obedience from the things which He suffered.” (Hebrews 5:8 NASU) Being obedient—especially doing something we really don’t want to do—will bring a form of suffering. It’s unlikely that you’ll ever suffer as much as Jesus did on the cross, but obedience will cost you some mental pain or emotional discomfort. The suffering usually results from not getting your own way about something. Be ready, stand firm, and you’ll come through on the other side of it—victorious! The more you learn to respectfully obey, the easier it will become. Then the turmoil and conflict will be replaced with joy and peace—a terrific trade!

Nicole’s older sister Steph caused constant turmoil in the family. At sixteen, Steph demanded to run her own life. She rebelled against everything: going to church, her curfew, doing homework, and any rule their parents set. In high school, she’d made new friends, and these friends liked to party. Nicole shared a room with her sister, who often dragged in reeking of alcohol and cigarettes. When Steph’s boyfriend dumped her, Steph was stunned and hurt. Nicole heard Steph pray for God to bring him back. When it didn’t happen, she blamed God and continued to rebel. Nicole shook her head. How could Steph expect God to hear her prayer—even if he wanted to help her—when she continued in her sinful and rebellious lifestyle?

Nicole’s sister is no different from many people. They rebel against the Lord’s instructions, but when an emergency strikes, they expect God to answer their prayers anyway. He won’t. “If anyone turns a deaf ear to my instruction, even their prayers are detestable.” (Proverbs 28:9 TNIV) God has made it clear throughout Scripture. He won’t help rebellious people. If you’re cherishing certain sins in your life, deal with them and get it out of your life. Then you’ll be in a position for God to hear your prayers.

When it was time for the Israelites to leave their slavery behind in Egypt, God did a marvelous thing for them. He caused their former owners, the Egyptians, to like the slaves so much that they gave the slaves whatever they wanted to take with them! God can make even your enemies so pleased with you that they want to help you.

You wish your enemy would do that! You’re sick of being picked on at school. You have no idea why Jason, the class clown, has singled you out, but he’s made fun of you all year. You tried ignoring him, as your teacher suggested. You stood up to him and demanded that he stop it, like your dad suggested. You’re tempted to call him names back, like your best friend suggests. Finally, you give up and do what you should have done in the first place: you pray. You ask God to change Jason’s heart and cause him to be friendly to you. Every time he picks on you, you pray again. Slowly, over a matter of weeks, Jason stops making fun of you. One day when you drop your books, you’re astounded when Jason stops and picks them up for you.

God can change the hearts of people.

You’ve been a believer since you were ten years old. You truly love Jesus more each year, and you talk to him often. Jesus is your constant companion and best friend as you move with your military dad from place to place. You love the Lord, but there are times you just don’t want to do what Jesus says. You don’t always want to obey your dad, especially when he barks at you as if you’re one of his soldiers. You don’t always want to give part of your allowance in the offering plate; sometimes you want to buy something for yourself with all the money. But you know that if you really love Jesus like you claim, you’ll obey what he tells you to do.

Jesus made it very plain. “If you love me, keep my commandments.” (John 14:15 TNIV) Obedience and love go together, whether we like it or not. Don’t tell Jesus (or others) that you love the Lord if you’re not willing to do what he tells you to do. “Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. Anyone who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them.” (John 14:21 TNIV) When you obey the Lord, he pours out such love on you. As you grow in this love, something wonderful happens. Obedience becomes a habit—and a joy!

Michelle’s sixth grade year was one long trial after another. In church camp the summer before, she was challenged to be bolder in her faith. So she decided to “come out of hiding.” Until now, she never mentioned church at school. She didn’t explain why she skipped certain movies or didn’t dress in the popular tight tees and mini-skirts. Michelle just tried to be nice and blend in. She never had to defend her faith—because no one knew she had any. Then in sixth grade, she wore her cross necklace and “What Would Jesus Do?” tee-shirt. She got noticed—and teased. When Michelle took stands on issues, she was often alone. But this was her attitude throughout: “I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” (Psalm 27:13-14 TNIV) She put her trust in God and focused on him instead of those who ridiculed her. Eventually, two girls told Michelle they were Christians too, and Michelle made two excellent friends.

Maybe you have two friends. They both tell you the truth, but one feels warm and caring, while the other girl’s “truth” cuts deep. When you all try out for the track team, Girlfriend #1 says to you, “You’re a natural for long distance running. You hardly broke a sweat running the mile!” Fake Friend #2 also speaks the truth. “You know, your short legs are stubby, so don’t even think about hurdles. You’ll fall flat on your face.” Both girls spoke the truth, but only one spoke the truth in love.

What are some signs of growth in believers? They speak words of truth, but in a loving manner. They aren’t brutal, then claim, “I’m just telling the truth. Don’t be so touchy.” Their love is also honest. “Love must be sincere.” (Romans 12:9 TNIV) No faking allowed! True Christian love is open and genuine, not two-faced and phony. A growing Christian backs up her loving words with action. “Let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.” (1 John 3:18 NKJV) As you grow, let love guide you—in your thoughts, words, and actions.

You know from many years of Sunday school that believers are supposed to “do everything without grumbling or arguing.” (Philippians 2:14 TNIV) And yet, some days you feel so frustrated that you’re ready to explode. Sometimes it’s little things: your sister drinking all the orange juice or your best friend forgetting to return your favorite shirt. Sometimes it’s big things: your mom yelling at you for no good reason or an unfair grade on a test. You bottle up your feelings, pretending things are great. When you pray, she feel like a phony.

You have a wrong idea about being honest with God. He’s the one person to whom you can always tell the absolute truth. If it weren’t all right to be totally honest with God, would David have written these Psalms? “O LORD, hear me as I pray; pay attention to my groaning.” (Psalm 5:1 NLT) “Give heed to me and answer me; I am restless in my complaint and am surely distracted.” (Psalm 55:2 NASU) And in Psalm 142:2 (TNIV), David says, “I pour out before him my complaint; before him I tell my trouble.” Being totally honest with God about your feelings is good. It isn’t the same as grumbling about your life to everyone you meet. It’s just sharing your feelings with him so you can sort them out together—and he can help you in each situation. Talk to God. He cares.

Insults, shameful comments, criticisms—all are words intended to hurt you. If you have a verbal abuser in your home, school, or neighborhood, you know how those remarks can wound your heart. They can even make you feel sick. Often no one else is around to hear the cruel words, and there is no one to comfort.

Michelle was overweight, and people teased her or criticized her about it. “Oink! Oink!” the neighbor boy said when she walked by. “Blubber body!” the kids at school called her. “Michelle, you’ll never slim down if you eat all that ice cream,” her mom lectured her. “Don’t you want to look pretty like your big sister?” Grandma asked her. An old nursery rhyme says, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Words may not make you bleed, but they definitely hurt—badly. In fact, abusive words can take far longer to heal than broken bones or cuts.

If insults have wounded you, go directly to Jesus with your hurt. He himself said he was sent to heal the brokenhearted. (Luke 4:18; Isaiah 61:1) Ask him to heal your heart from the pain caused by scornful words. Believe it or not, God can comfort you better than any person on earth. In fact, the Holy Spirit is called the “Comforter.” Comforting is one of his most important jobs. “I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever.” (John 14:16 KJV) God says you are worthy, valuable, and made in his image. And God loves you just the way you are!

Your youth group wants to spread that message to the kids in the homeless shelter in your city. You’re excited to go for the first time. You envision playing games with kids happy to see you. Or maybe you’ll read stories to an eager group of toddlers. Maybe they’ll let you make cookies in the kitchen with some of the children.

Three hours later, you head home, silent in the back seat of the teacher’s car. Yes, you got to play some games, but the kids weren’t what you expected. Four of them asked you if you knew where their mommy was. Two begged to come home with you, and you had to peel one little girl from your leg. You look down at the round yellow smiley face pin on your jacket that says: "Smile! God loves you!" But you wonder…

It’s hard to look at some of the conditions in the world and see God’s love in it. But when man was first created, God gave human beings free choice. Human beings fail at loving others. They fail often, and they can fail badly. Without God’s love in our hearts, none of us can love anyone very well. Yes, people fail us. But God never does. Stay close to him. He is love—and he will love others through you if you let him. Keep giving to those in need. Let them see God’s love in you.

You’re late for church again, and as you hurry toward the youth building, you spot a girl in your group with her arms full. The large flat box she’s carrying looks like a donut box. Trying to buy popularity again, you think, slowing down. You’ve watched her for several weeks. She was new to the church, but everyone knew her name by now—especially the boys. She always brought food, and they swarmed around her at every meeting. You understand that she wants to be accepted, but in your opinion, that’s not the way to go about it. Most of the girls could barely stand her now.

You see her trying to balance the box of donuts and her Bible and get the door open. Maybe she’ll spill them on the ground, you think hopefully. Then you hear the unmistakable nudge from God. If she were in a wheelchair, wouldn’t you hurry and open the door for her? Do you have to like a person or feel superior in order to be kind to someone? Ouch. You decide to "put on kindness" and hurry to open the door. You even carry her Bible for her as you enter the youth room together.

"Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience." (Colossians 3:12 NIV) The next time you’re dressing for success, give less thought to your color scheme and more thought to the character clothing you want to wear. Envision yourself dressing in a shirt of kindness, a hat of patience, a coat of gentleness, a skirt of humility, and shoes of peace. Now that makes a godly fashion statement!

Until recently, you hadn’t given much thought to what you’d eat or wear. You just headed to the fridge or went out for pizza when hungry. That was before your Dad’s company down-sized and he lost his job. For a while, there was enough money in savings, and you barely noticed any change. Your parents talked a lot, but stopped when you came into the room. Lately, you’ve noticed many changes. Dad doesn’t go on as many job interviews. You never eat at restaurants anymore, and hamburger is appearing for supper more and more.

One day you spotted Dad looking in the paper at real estate ads. "Are we selling our house?" you ask nervously. "Will we have a place to live? Please tell me what’s going on!" Together your parents sit down with you. They explain that you need a smaller house, may sell one of the cars, and the family vacation has been postponed. Your stomach knots up in fear, and yet you can’t help noticing that your parents seem very calm. Your dad explains when you ask. "I know God will supply everything we really need," he says. "Philippians 4:19 says so. I am doing my best—and so is your mother—to seek God’s will in where to live and what jobs to pursue. We’re praying and trusting God to provide. I know he will. He’s never let us down before."

You wish you had your parents’ faith, but you do feel calmer because they seem so sure. Several days later, you come home to find a "For Sale" sign in the yard. "We’re down-sizing too," Dad says, "and we’re moving closer to my new job!" You all celebrate with hot dogs by candlelight, laughing and praising God for his provision. And you’re grateful for both of the fathers who take care of you!

You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!--Isaiah 26:3 (NLT)

You're playing softball in the vacant lot next to your house one hot Saturday afternoon. You bat the ball hard, sending the softball in a straight line to your best friend. The ball slips between her hands and hits her in the eye, knocking her flat. Dizzy and head pounding, she lies there as you and your sister lean over her. Your wide-eyed sister Lily screams for your mom. Your best friend starts to cry. You can see she is getting worried, so you take a deep breath, pray for God's healing and strength, and pat her arm.

You calmly tell your sister to go get your dad. After Lily runs off, you tell your friend, "I'm sorry. Just relax and close your eyes. My dad will be here in a minute." Your peaceful attitude helps your friend calm down. You spread peace to your friend, staying calm in the middle of this "storm." Focusing on God's strength and care will keep us calm. And when we're calm, we think and feel better. So do the people around us. Let God's peace fill you at all times.

In the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve could eat the fruit from any tree they liked—except one. But Eve disobeyed God’s command and ate the forbidden fruit. Adam also ate it. When God confronted them, Adam blamed both God and the woman for his own sin. (“It was the woman that you gave me who brought me the fruit.”) Eve had her own excuse, and she blamed the serpent. (“He tricked me.”)

You might find yourself making excuses for your problems too. Maybe you’re naturally shy, and your goal is to blend in and not be noticed. However, you’re very lonely this way. “Everyone’s so unfriendly,” you tell her mom. “They stare right past me!” Only after an honest discussion about your behavior at school can you see your part in the problem. You admit that you don’t look at or talk to people. You avoid groups and disappear by herself. Finally you decide to take responsibility and change. After a few weeks of forcing yourself to talk to your classmates, things changed. Your unfriendly classmates magically transform into fun friends!

The game of “poor me” and “it’s your fault” got started in the Garden of Eden. To this day, people blame their problems on others. They blame their parents, their teachers, and the world in order to shift the responsibility. Some people prefer to believe that something else is controlling the outcome of their lives. However, we must stop blaming others and study our own behavior instead. Take personal responsibility for change. Then you can turn around and head in the direction of God’s good plan for your life.

Samantha wasn’t athletic or pretty. She couldn’t sing, play an instrument, or create art. But Samantha was very popular. Why? She loved others, and she showed it by encouraging people. She cheered hard at the baseball games. She attended her classmates’ concerts and complimented them on their band and vocal solos. She noticed when people looked sad and did her best to cheer them up. She didn’t do it to be popular, but people loved having her around.

How can you be an encourager? Notice when someone tries hard to accomplish something. Say, “Great job!” or “Way to go!” Also, find someone going through a hard experience that you have been through yourself. If your parents were divorced a few years ago, and a classmate is now coping with it, you can offer encouragement. Let her know that things will get better. You could also tell her about the comfort you received from God, who is the best encourager of all: “the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4 TNIV) Make it your goal to encourage someone in your family or at school every day. One surprising benefit will be that your own joy will greatly increase.

Happy Memorial Day, everyone! For every military man or woman--including my daughter, Laurie, deployed in Iraq--we love you and are so proud of you. To hear something sung by elementary and high school students that will stir your very soul, turn up your sound and click here:

Amanda took on too much work. When her science class had team projects, she wanted to do an excellent job—and the others let her. She organized the meetings, did the research, typed the reports, and made the displays. When her youth group collected food for the homeless, Amanda went door to door every night after school and all day Saturday. She carted the canned goods to the church in her brother’s wagon. She went along to deliver food to the shelter downtown. The following week, due to exhaustion and a weakened immune system, she caught a nasty virus. Amanda meant well, but taking on too much responsibility hurt her.

Moses once did the same thing. Moses tried to handle all the questions and problems of several million Israelite people. From morning to night, he wore himself out listening to all their problems himself. It was too much. He couldn’t handle it alone. He needed a plan to share the work with others. “What you are doing is not good,” [his father-in-law told him.] “You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone.” Exodus 18: 17-18 (NIV)

We need to use wisdom when agreeing to jobs. If you “bite off more than you can chew,” you may end up sick (and unable to do all you promised.) If your job turns out to be more time-consuming than you expected, it’s all right to ask for help. Amanda needed to learn that she couldn’t do it all. Sometimes we feel if we don’t do it all, it won’t get done right. Sometimes that’s true—but usually it’s not. We can let others help. It’s great to work hard, but find a healthy balance.